Attack of the Purple Dinosaur

I’m not sure this is politically correct to say – but what the hell.  I HATE BARNEY.  There, I said it.  I’m sure lightening will strike.

I can’t put my finger on it – but the large, purple, nasally sounding fake dinosaur gets on my every last nerve.  Give me Sesame Street ANYDAY over the nauseatingly cheezy “I Love You” theme song.  GAG. 

todllers and barney

Seriously? Is this dude creepy or what?

We managed to escape the Barney-madness with Nicholas.  I thought I was home free. 

Then somehow – some way  – horror upon horrors – Josie has been bit by the Barney Bug.  And there is no cure.

Just seeing the purple monster sends Josie into an orbit.  I try to distract her to no avail.  She cannot be deterred from Barney, Baby Bop and all of his other weirdo friends. 

Oh – and to rub salt into the wound –  in my former life in Texas – I used to work at the Fort Worth Zoo. 

Heard of the movie – “Barney Went to the Zoo”?

Yep.  Filmed at our zoo.  During the time I was working there.  Really?  Why couldn’t Ernie and Bert visit the zoo?  Why did it have to be the purple dinosaur?

And people, let me tell you.  THere was more security for Barney than for the president.  Children went APE-SH** when they saw purple.  I can only equate it to a toddler Elvis sighting.  It was not pretty.

And Barney was also a bit of a diva.  Talk about high-maintenance.  We had to drive his purple butt all over the zoo – he couldn’t walk anywhere.  (Really?  You are a disgrace to your species). 

Our zoo was so proud.  We had local tv crews covering the story like we had just acquired a baby elephant or something really cool.  It was disturbing to see all the frenzy over a plush purple so-called dinosaur and his creepy entourage. 

And guess what we received for all our help for the Barney shoot?  About a gazillion “Barney Goes to the Zoo” DVDs.  Which I’m quite sure are at the bottom of some land-fill at this time.  (My friend Sean was actually IN the video with Barney – he will never ever live that down).

My friend got paid in Barney videos.

So, as you can see – my Barney trauma goes way back.  It is a cruel evil joke that my daughter is smitten. 

Parental control over PBS?  It just may come to that.

Life Without Barney

And for those of you who missed my healthy snacks segment (complete with antics from Tristan).  Here ’tis!