Okay – so it just seems WRONG to put Hell in the same sentence as Christmas. I know. My apologies.
So my friend, morning show anchor and fellow mom of four, Michelle Linn of Fox23 and I had a great time brainstorming this segment. (Actually, Michelle had the most fun. After her nightmare Elmo experiences, I think this was cathartic for her). WIth eight kids between us – we have seen it all. The good, the bad and the VERY ANNOYING of Christmas gifts.
We decided to combine our knowledge and help our viewers out a little…on what NOT to give the lil’ darlings this year. (or, if you just want to piss someone off – this is the list for you.).
The What- Not -To- Get -Kids Christmas Gift List
compiled by Michelle and Marnie (well, mostly Michelle)
There’s nothing worse than giving your child some fantastic toy, and they can’t play with it on Christmas Day because no one has batteries to run it.
Teeny tiny pieces
Our other pet peeve are toys with teeny tiny parts, or beads. Our issue is that people may give our older children that crap, but they have younger siblings who like to put that stuff in her mouth, and it’s impossible to police, and we find those little beads and crap (can you tell how we feel about this?) all over the house and we HATE all of that. Polly Pocket dolls and art kits with BEADS are the biggest offenders. Legos are a close second.
- These are perfect for fitting into the nose, eyes and ears of curious toddlers…and a guaranteed visit to the ER
Total rookie mistake… any mom would NEVER commit this faux pas, but it’s a common error made by grandparents. Mostly our in-laws, and they have young kids. Go figure. Senility? It’s a guaranteed way to make this mom mad on Christmas – ruin a festive holiday outfit with permanent marker.
Loud toys that can’t be turned off
We once had a personalized Elmo doll. I gave it to my daughter on her first birthday. It plugged into the computer and you answered a bunch of questions about her. That way Elmo knew her birthday, her favorite color, her favorite food, what time she took naps, and went to bed. Big problem. Somehow Elmo was possessed, and would SHOUT from the toy box, at 3AM “GOOD MORNING! IT’S TIME TO GET UP! ELMO WANTS TO PLAY! LET’S HAVE BREAKFAST!” Needless to say, we don’t still have him.
Electronics that require monthly service plans
iPhones, DVRs – whatever is your fancy. Don’t buy it for your niece, nephew or grandkids unless you are prepared to pay the monthly plan. My brother bought me a toll – tag for my birthday. And bless his little heart – three years later, he is still paying my bill. (I honestly don’t think that was his plan). Same goes with subscriptions…don’t buy a subscription to a magazine or a membership to the zoo unless you plan to renew it.
Best gift? Sure to please parents?
Books!!! You just can’t go wrong!!! They aren’t messy. They don’t take up a ton of space. They won’t rot my kid’s brain.
There you have it, folks.
I posed the question to my Facebook friends as well. Moon sand, train whistles (no-brainer) and possessed Elmos also made the list.
So if my children receive any of said gifts from friends or family this year – I will know that they must not like me. Or just don’t read my blog.