Yep. We did it again. After staying put for most of Spring Break – the Fernandez Family (minus daddy – he is the smart one) decided to tempt the travel gods one more time and take the kids on a mini road trip.
But, just taking our four wasn’t quite enough. We somehow felt the need to double the load.
Yes, you read correctly. Eight children under the age of 10. To the Sam Noble Museum of Natural History in Norman, Oklahoma.
Now, to qualify – I did have some help. My sis in law (my brother was on a “playdate” at the NCAA tournament…by the way – how did all the dad’s get out of this outing?) And my parents. (who also, I might add invited the neighbor twins to increase our total to eight – gee thanks, dad).
So down the highway we go. Two SUV’s, three car seats, four boosters, twelve bodies and a partridge in a pear tree.
No sooner than five minutes into the trip we forgot the snacks. Much to our passengers chagrin, we turned around. Ten minutes later we had more complaining from the peanut gallery as to when we were going to be there because “this was taking just WAY too long.” (Well, honey – your other option is to get out and walk). This scare tactic seemed to work.
Apparently, we weren’t the only ones who had this idea. The museum was beyond PACKED. Each adult had a certain number of kiddos to keep up with and we STILL managed to lose a couple. (I used to make fun of the parent’s who had their kids on leashes while at the mall. I now understand the necessity of this invention).
Then we found the rowdy ones (that would be my boys) climbing on top of statues of horses and making lewd gestures on the Wooly Mammoth’s scuplture’s private parts. Nice. This is about the time the security guards showed up.
Kids? What kids? I’ve never seen them before – I’m here by myself.
Anyway. Trying to keep up with eight wild children in a crowded area would try the patience of Mother Teresa. So you can just imagine my state of mind. Valium anyone?
And speaking of anxiety – I did misplace my baby. Who was in a stroller. Yep, probably shouldn’t admit that one in public. After my heart stopped and blood ran cold – I realized she was in the very capable hands of my six year old son and nephew who decided she needed to go spelunking through the cave exhibit.
After a few meltdowns, lost cash, more chastising from security guards and maybe a few damaged exhibits…four weary adults dragged eight hyper children to the car.
And that my friends – is why my children will remain culturally illiterate. Unless I pay someone else to take them.